Thursday, December 12, 2013

Missile Nog

It's interesting to us how many of our Christmas traditions center around the simple task of decorating the Christmas tree.  Listening to the Grinch song on repeat until Katie can't stand it and turns on Trans-Siberian Orchestra, Jake hanging the hideous homemade ornaments from his childhood front and center on the Christmas tree (one is a matte gray-painted styrofoam ball with colorful snowflake-shaped sequins sporadically glued to it, affectionately named the 'Death Star'), Katie discreetly moving those same ornaments to the lower back portion of the tree before visitors stop by, and, of course, drinking eggnog.  For an occasion such as this, there must be eggnog!

"What should we do to make this eggnog unique?" Jake asked Katie

"There's no need to--it's December and people are already drinking regular eggnog for Christmas," said Katie

"But, but..." Jake protested

"Just make some regular old eggnog so we can decorate the tree!" Katie interjected.

So here we present, somewhat dejectedly, a standard recipe for making normal eggnog.  But wait!  What if it's served under mistletoe?  Then it could be missile nog!  Ok, that works.  To give full credit, everything but the pasteurization step comes straight from sister-in-law Julia.  Thanks, Julia!

Start with 3 cups a milking and 12 eggs-a-yolking.  Beat the egg yolks until thick and light yellow, then mix in the milk.
Heat to 160 °F to kill any salmonella-a-lurking.
Mix in one cup-a-sugaring and another 3 cups-a-milking.  Cool to one room-a-temperaturing.
Pour into eight cups-a-waiting and garnish with two pinches-a-nutmegging and two pinches-a-cinnamoning.
Make sure Katie has to go under the mistletoe to get hers.  Then surprise her like a heat-seeking missile with a smooch! (And you thought missile nog was a stretch...)
Make sure to enjoy at least one glass each while decorating a Christmas tree.  Or a Hanukkah bush.  Or a Kwanzaa shrub.  Or whatever you're into.

The recipe:
12 egg yolks
6 cups milk, divided into two batches of three cups
1 cup sugar
2 pinches nutmeg per glass
2 pinches cinnamon per glass

Beat egg yolks until thick and yellow, then mix in 3 cups milk.  Heat until 160 °F, mix in sugar and then remaining milk.  Cool to room temp (or colder), pour into glasses, and garnish with nutmeg and cinnamon.

What are your tree-decorating traditions?  How many of them involve eggnog?  Let us know in the comments section below!

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